Why dissatisfaction alone won’t change a thing

Negative emotions can motivate some. For example, plenty of people have become successful from a desire to prove others wrong. Positive emotions can motivate others. For example, those who succeed often thank the people who supported them. However, whether negative or positive emotions fuel you, no one can depend on dissatisfaction to propel them forward.

Dissatisfaction is a good indicator of which direction to go toward, but it does not give you the energy to take that first step. Click To Tweet

In one way, people find themselves unhappy with where they are in life, so they think they need to take action to get themselves out of it–yet what they end up doing is absolutely nothing until that moment passes and everything feels okay again–only to yet again find themselves in a place of discontent.

In this case, dissatisfaction is just the cycle of life, and people need to recognize the problem is not always the situation but the mindset–meaning not accepting that no matter where they are, it won’t be rainbows and sunshine 24/7. 

This doesn’t mean they should just deal with it, but they need to take a step back and analyze. Are there other moments that seem right and happy? Are they mostly dissatisfied, does it split evenly, or are they usually happy with the situation? 

What some may need is not motivation but a reality check–the acceptance that because the grass may be greener on the other side doesn’t mean it’s not green where they stand now. Everyone has off days. Every job has unpleasant but necessary tasks involved. Every person around you likewise has off days which may affect your day. All of these are variables that will not disappear just because you relocate yourself to another situation.

The easiest example is jobs. People often grow discontent with a job and decide to move to another company–only to meet the same problems over and over again because, guess what, the problem could be inevitable. The problem might not even be a problem. THEY could be the problem. They might not be grounded in reality.  They could have unrealistic expectations. They could be that co-worker. They could hate challenges. They could think they are too good for a certain task.

Some people do not even understand the actual problem at hand leading to the dissatisfaction. They may think it is the company they are at, but it could really be the job or industry itself. They may think it is the person they are with in a relationship, but it may actually be their unhappiness with themselves. 

Once they realize they truly are dissatisfied with their situation, is that enough to motivate them to get out of the situation? My belief is still no. Human beings are, in my opinion, genetically built to adapt to a given situation. This can lead to complacency. This could lead to a resigned acceptance of the dissatisfaction due to a lack of will or motivation otherwise. They have become used to that specific type of discomfort that they would rather not have to step out of the comfort zone and acclimate to an altogether different type.

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Remember, negative emotions can indeed fuel certain desires. Going back to the previous example, being told no or looked down on can fuel a desire to prove someone wrong. Then proving someone wrong becomes the action. It creates initiative. The goal here is to prove others wrong. Dissatisfaction alone does not motivate any goals except, again, to get out of a situation. You have no vision or clue where to go from there–what situation do you want to get into? Because many people have no idea, they just stick around for lack of a better alternative.

Desire to get out of a situation is not desire to get into a new one.  Click To Tweet

You want to solve a specific set of problems, and dissatisfaction is an umbrella term for them. What needs or wants are not being met through this dissatisfaction? Then shift your focus on what you want in life and real resolutions. That will motivate you more. 

Dissatisfaction on its own cannot get you moving. A lot of people know they are dissatisfied but they do not know for sure what would indeed satisfy them. So instead of focusing on the crappy situation you are in, think of what you truly want in life. What would make you satisfied? Then disconnect those ideals from where you are now because you will only be reminded of what you do not have and what you do not want. That will only depress you, and you will use any imaginings for escaping that situation as purely that–escapism. You need tangible goals. You need to move away from dissatisfaction to fulfillment. 

So stop complaining and thinking about how life is not the way you want it to be because that does not help. Stop thinking when things start going down again in this cycle that you have to get out so you will. In all honesty, you will probably just wait for things to get good again. Recognize that no matter what, things will always suck again at some point or another, but at least you will be in a place of better contentment once you find a vision that works for you, rather than the other way around.

I hope this makes sense and if not, feel free to ask questions below or give your own experience to show that this is not entirely true. How did dissatisfaction work for you? Or how did you get out of a situation you did not like and into a new one you did like? What goals drove you out of a bad place? Things are never quite as cut and dry as I try to make them because people and the world are complicated–so let me know below!

To help you get started if you are in a funk, here are some quick and easy tips!


gallantly gal

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